Worst Spider-Man Figure Ever

In honor of the release of Spider-Man 3 today, it was a natural to post the worst ever Spider-Man action figure: Beach Spider-Man. This was part of the horrid line of "Adventure Hero" Spideys that included Fisherman Spider-Man and Ninja Spider-Man. Believe me, I debated putting up Fisherman Spidey, but he looked so damn relaxed that I couldn't bring myself to do it. It was the backward hat on Beach Spidey that ultimately won me over. Thank God they stopped this line when they did: future releases included Billing Compliance Coordinater Spidey, Ultrasound Technician Spidey, Dock Porter Spidey, Marketing Assistant Spidey and Coffee Barista Spidey. Hey, they're the real heroes in this workaday world.

What has two thumbs and like to smash puny humans?

This Hulk!

Swamp Thing Bog Rover

The "thing" in Swamp Thing obviously did not refer to his muck encrusted manhood, because he seems to be over compensating for it with the Bog Rover and its "launching grappling missle." Maybe he's off to have a pissing contest with the Man-Thing, who chose his name more carefully to entice the ladies.